Life isn’t always easy..

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Annie, Blogs, Books, choice, Dreams, family, Florida, fun, laughter, life, love, loved ones, Moving, relationship, writing

I know it’s been awhile since I’ve posted anything on this page or my Sexwannie blog. But life isn’t always easy.

There are important things that get in the way of writing a blog. Life gets in the way. And so does death.

My husband and I have been though so much in a very short period of time.

On May 5th 2015 we lost my father in law to heart disease. Then a week later on May 12th my Mom lost her battle with Cancer.

That’s when I lost my way. My Mom was my heart, and my biggest fan.

I still cannot believe she’s gone.

I go to call her and then reality kicks in. She’s not here.

I look for signs that she told me she would send. I see them, I know she’s watching over me.

I just want her here.

It was Mom who pushed me to write and publish my first novel.

Know  I don’t know how I’m supposed to finish my second without her here.

When I started my blogs it was my Mama who would say “You’re on your way little girl.”

Its had not having her here pushing me to write. She had been telling me my entire life I needed to keep writing. .

So now it’s been about six weeks since she’s gone and I’m so lost without her.

We have moved out of Jersey. Packed up everything we thought we might use. And staying with someone who I thought was family.

If we could move again we would be out of here tonight.

“Don’t tell my Mom on her death bed that you will take care of me, and then once I give up everything I’ve ever known turn your back on me”.

I don’t eat, I don’t sleep, and someone keeps asking me; “Why are you crying?”

They say moving and losing a loved one are the most stressful things in life.

Well we’ve gone through both in a very short period of time. To say I’m stressed to the max would be an understatement.

I haven’t been able to write a word till today.

I know if she was still here she would be telling me to get on with it. “Live your life Little girl, do it for me”.

It’s not that easy to resume your life when someone so special and close in your life dies.

The only reason I’m writing this now is because my hubby shamed me into it. “What would your mom think Annie?” Well I’m pretty sure she would understand that I’m hurting. She would also tell me that life doesn’t stand still while you’re grieving.

My Mom was a very smart woman.

She is missed every minute of every day.

I know this post may not be much to most of you. But it’s a huge step forward for me.

I want to thank you all for sticking by me while I get my life in order. I really do miss interacting with all of you.

That’s it for now. Make sure you let your parents and loved one’s know how much you love them.

We are only put on this earth for a very short time. It’s so important to let those we love know how we feel. I’m so glad there were no words left unspoken.

Life really sucks sometimes. And sometimes we have no choice but to move forward. Even if it’s one day or minute at a time..

Hugs to all of you!!!

 

 

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Use It or Lose It

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adult, Annie, back surgery, Blogs, Daily post, happiness, health, husband, kink, laughter, life, lose, love, marriage, relationship, remembering, Sex, wife, words, writing prompts

DAILY PROMPT

Write about anything you’d like, but make sure the post includes this sentence:

“I thought we’d never come back from that one.” 

Whenever I hear the phrase use it or lose it I think of sex.

I can’t help it, that’s just how my brain works. Think about it this way; the more we have sex the more we think about sex and the more we think about sex the more want sex.

If we slack off or lose that loving feeling. We must think, use it or lose it.

So I started to think; how long was the longest dry spell between sexual encounters? As far as I can remember it had to be when I had my first back surgery. That was in nineteen eighty-nine.

I was in such a bad way. That surgery almost killed me. I remember screaming as a spasm grabbed hold of me.  I wasn’t able to walk on my own for six months. Now you would think I wasn’t thinking about sex. But I was thinking about sex. I mean we had only been married for three years.

I was thinking this is the longest we’ve ever gone without it.

Will my husband wait for me?

Will he leave me?

Does he love me enough to wait?

Will I ever want sex again?

Will my body keep failing me or will I walk again?

Why did this happen to me?

And am I ever going to get back to some kind of normal?

Yes I was feeling all sorts of sorry for myself at that time. And I was a mess if you really want to know the truth. I also had to take steroids.  I had what they call moon face. It’s not a very attractive look, especially for a twenty-nine year old woman. Moon face at any age can put you over the edge, but in your twenties it’s that much worse.

Being on steroids I also gained about thirty pounds.  And being only four-foot ten inches tall I wasn’t feeling my sexy side if you know what I mean. Hell I couldn’t even find my sexy side.

So here I was not able to walk on my own, in excruciating pain, with a body and face as big as the moon. I remember feeling like a huge beach ball with a face.

It was hard to look in the mirror each day, and when I did I cried. So I was thinking: how could my husband look at me and still want sex?

And even though sex at that time was physically impossible. I couldn’t put my mind around him still wanting me in that way.  But he did. And somehow he would make me forget what I looked like. This amazing man would tell me I was beautiful and that he loved me each and every day. He also reassured me that he wasn’t going anywhere.

It was this man who got me through one of the hardest times in my life.

All I had to do was hear his voice and I would feel a calm come over me.  Yes, It was his voice that would get me through some of my toughest days.

Fast forward through a year of the hardest physical and then aquatic therapy and I was finally able to get half of my strength back. I got rid of the walker and steroids. My face went back to normal. Sure I still had about twenty pounds to lose but I was starting to feel like myself.

Through all this I realized that we did have that unconditional love thing going for us. So I promised to never doubt his love again.

I know that I am one of the luckiest women in the world. I may have to live with chronic back pain for the rest of my life but I had made it back from a failed open lumbar back Laminectomy. Yes I was left with chronic pain for the rest of my life.

And I found out was that I have a husband who will always be there for me no matter what.  And I realized if he could stand by my side through a year of hell without physical sex 😉 than I knew without a doubt that we could make it back from anything.

Yes there were times when  “I thought we’d  never come back from that one.”  But we did.

Oh and the sex? Well our sex life just keeps getting better. It turns out that we never lost that connection. And that’s why I always say: “Where there’s a will there’s definitely a way.” With sex it doesn’t have to be physical. sex is a state of mind. And you either use it or lose it!

 

The Mirror Crack’d

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Annie, attitude, blog, Daily post, fun, laughter, life, Lost, Mirrors, money, poor, post, reflection, relationship, Rich, writing prompts

 

 

DAILY PROMPT

You wake up one morning to a world without mirrors. How does your life — from your everyday routines to your perception of yourself — change?

(Thanks for suggesting this thought-provoking prompt, Chocolate Eyes!)

Without mirrors we might see more clearly the ugly side of people.  Yes, there would be a lot of out of sorts, crazy looking people everywhere. But then everyone would look that way.

But I have a feeling for the right price mirrors could be had. So of course the rich would have mirrors. And this would cause friction between the haves and the have-nots.

I can see it now the haves with their noses in the air Looking just as perfect as perfect can be.  And the have-nots doing their best to look somewhat normal by using a widow panes to get a glimpse of their reflection.

A reflection can be seen many ways. Maybe it’s in the way you treat others that are less fortunate. If we all looked a little disheveled everyday then maybe people could lighten up just a little.

There might even be more laughter as people dress in colors that don’t match. And we would have to rely on the kindness of others to let us know when things like hair dye was needed.

It would be a strange world without mirrors. And maybe it’s a good thing we never have to worry about it.

That’s my story and I’m sticking to it..

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Puggle Lynyrd Skynyrd Public Service Announcement

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family, Four Legged Babies, friends, Guest author, laughter, love, pictures, relationship, smile

Safety First, Our four legged babies need us to make sure they’re safe.

Help Us Help Our 4-Legged Frynds

 

Even though I can do the doggie paddle, I could get tired so I wear my life vest because I’d rather be safe than sorry!!!  To all of my 4-Legged Frynds when boating with your human parents please make sure you wear a life vest. Paws Up Brothers & Sisters, L-Dog out……………..

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That Sucks

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author, blog, family, friends, Guest author, laughter, life, love, Oxygen, post, relationship, smile, words

When you’re feeling down about what has been thrown your way look what others are going through. Life sucks sometimes. But sometimes it’s a good thing, Ask LaRae Parry..

MARSocial Author Business Enhancement Humor Post

My lungs suck. No. Wait a minute. They don’t suck. That’s the problem–they don’t suck at all. They just sit there—in my chest cavity—taking up space. It’s cruddy. No kidding.

Complaining about it doesn’t make my rotten lungs any better, so I don’t do it . . . all the time. Not everyday, anyway.

Because of my nonfunctioning lungs, I have to wear supplemental oxygen all the time. That sucks. Really. I have a machine that sucks pure oxygen out of the air and pumps it into my lungs. It’s great to suck.

There are some days, however, that I wonder if it’s worth the hassle to even get out of bed. I’m serious. Getting out of bed means I have to breathe more. Then, when that happens, I have to get clean. Then I see pictures of my children, grandchildren, and get on my computer and see my friends…

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The Ultimate Dinner Party

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Annie, Celebrities, Cocktails, Daily post, eats, family, friends, life, love, lunch, Mike, relationship, writing prompts

DAILY PROMPT

Seat Guru

You get to plan a dinner party for 4-8 of your favorite writers/artists/musicians/other notable figures, whether dead or alive. Who do you seat next to whom in order to inspire the most fun evening?

It’s funny that this Daily Prompt came up. I have what I call the lunch table. I’ve always pictured a huge round table. It takes place at Carmines in NYC. And the people I would invite have changed over the years. But I do have a few that are always a constant. My husband Mike, he’s my best friend and how could I possibly go to a lunch like this without my best friend.

My Mom is going with me to meet all these interesting people. She can hold a conversation with anyone. And she would absolutely love this. Mom gets to sit next to whomever she wants. This is not a formal luncheon it’s a meal with friends.

Whoopie Goldberg is one woman that I have always admired and would love to meet. She’s honest, funny and she knows everyone.

Carole King is my all time favorite singer. Her Tapestry album has been the one constant in my CD collection. Anyone who can write lyrics like that is Ok in my book.

Now John Stewart is the guy who’s going to bring topics. He’s also the guy that will get the conversation going and there will never be any of that awkward silence.

Elton John, I love him. I just have a feeling he would wind up being the life of the party.

Sandra Bullock seems to be a very down to earth woman.  How much fun would it be if she just happened to bring Melissa McCarthy. Now that would be when my Mom would tell me, “Close your mouth Annie,” Lol..

Robin Williams is next on the list. I’ve often thought that he might take over and that no one else would be able to get a word in.  But then I think he might enjoy letting others lead for a change. And can you just imagine the laughter after a few drinks.

Meryle Streep, She’s from Jersey and to me that means she’s real. So why not have her at my luncheon. And she just might come.

Joan Cusack is one woman who loves to laugh. She’s a little quirky and to me these are the best people to have fun with. I’m a little quirky too and so Joan makes the cut.

And the last person at my luncheon would be Steve Madden. Yup the same Steve Madden that makes shoes. I’ve read his story and he seems like a down to earth kind of guy. He’s from Long Island and hey he might even bring us all goodie bags.

Like I said my table changes from time to time. I have had Bruce Willis, Brad Pitt and Jason Statham at my table if for nothing else they would be fun to look at.

Now I know this is make believe. But if this was actually about to happen who do you think would call or text last minute to say they weren’t coming. Of course they would apologize. And maybe even say they would make it up to me. But I’m a realist. And I wouldn’t be holding my breath.

The fact is not one person on this list besides my husband and Mom would actually show up to have lunch with me at Carmines in NYC. But that’s Ok. Because sitting with the two people who love me the most and eating amazing Italian food would really be all I need.

In Fact screw all these people strangers that are put on pedestals. I’m making a new list.

Mike, Mom, Michael & Loring, Jennifer & Harry, Tammy & Tom, Steven & Michael, Ralph & Irene,  Along with all my nieces and nephews is all I could ever want to have sitting around a table breaking bread with me. If I could add a couple other people I would add my two besties, Sherry, Deb and Mike.

You see when it comes down to it we all just want to be with the people who love us for who we are. If any of those people on that fictitious list actually said yes to my invite I would be a nervous wreck. And who wants odjetta before you eat one bite.

Well that’s my story and I’m sticking to it..

 

 

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Instant Celebrity

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Celebrity, Champagne, Congressmen/women, Daily post, Dreams, family, handbags, laughter, life, Middle class, money, Philanthropist, relationship, Rich, Shoes, simple, Union, Warren Buffett, Wealthy, working, writing prompts

Drinking Champagne on Siesta Key is something I would like to do.

DAILY PROMPT

If you could be a famous person for a day, who would you be? Why? I think I would be Warren Buffett or Bill Gates. From what I have seen these men are smart and have hearts. They both can do what ever they like.  And yet they choose to give to the less fortunate.

If I was a monetary rich woman with unlimited funds I would be able to help so many people. Sure I would make sure in that one day that I helped my family for the rest of their lives. I’m not stupid.

Rules For Dating is Sexy Sunday #22

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adult, dating, flirting, fun, help, kinky, laughter, life, love, marriage, New, relationship, rules, self, Sex w/Annie, sexy, Sexy Sunday, YES!

SEX w/ Annie

Dating and getting naked is so much fun..

I’ve gotten quite a few e-mails from both men and women who are reading my #SexySunday blog post each week.  They want to know what I think about dating. There are so many lonely people out there that have broken up with their spouse or have gotten a divorce.  So what are they supposed to do on a #SexySunday?  How are they supposed to have a #SexySunday when there’s no one to share it with?

There’s nothing like a romantic walk or dance in the rain..

We are all in this sexy world together and starting over is no joke.

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What’s the one piece of advice you wish someone had given you a year (or five, or ten…) ago?

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advice, Bow chicka bow, Daily post, family, life, marriage, relationship, Romance, Sex, together

Powerful Suggestion What’s the one piece of advice you wish someone had given you a year (or five, or ten…) ago? Or in my case thirty years ago.

I wish someone would have advised or told us to buy my hubby’s Dad’s home. We had only been dating a few months when my hubby told me his dad was selling the house.

I guess you don’t think about things like that when you’re in your twenties and head over heels in love.  And your sure as shit not thinking of buying a home for your future. Making a purchase like that wasn’t even a blip on our radar screen.

No one told us that we should buy my husbands childhood home. Or that it would be a great investment for our future.

And so of course we didn’t buy the house which was under a hundred thousand dollars and in an a really nice neighborhood.  Haha, I laugh because there were a lot of things no one gave us a heads up on.

And that house today would be worth at least three times as much. I guess when you’re in love and all you’re thinking about is how good the sex is you’re surely not worrying about investments.  It’s just you and the one you love..

It’s thirty years later. Our love and relationship is as strong as it ever could be. And the sex is even better than it was back then.  Life hasn’t always been kind. But together we know we can make it through anything.  Sure it would have been great to own our very own home. But that advice never came. The more I think about it now it wouldn’t have mattered.  We probably wouldn’t have listened anyway, LOl..

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What’s the one phrase that immediately cheers you up.

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Annie, beautiful, blog, Blush, laughter, love, Mike, phrase, pictures, relationship, sexy, writing

The one phrase that cheers me up immediately when I hear it is; “You are beautiful.”

He does it to me every time.

You see my husband Mike has a way of putting a smile on my face any time he says this to me. And Since I never thought I was beautiful it just makes me giggle. Of course I get all school girl and blush. At my age when you hear something like that how can it not cheer you up. Thank you baby.

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